Home again

This photograph of our view was taken when we just moved into our cottage at Upper Moutere and it was spring time, everything looked fresh and green.
Spring passed, summer went and now we are in the autumn season.
So much has happened in those months we have been living here.
We transformed a neglected cottage and garden into our own rustic, shabby chic looking home and the garden one day will be full of flowers and well pruned fruit trees, thanks to the hard work of my husband Henk.
We are bottling and eating the fruit of our trees and the crops were plentiful this year because of our hot,long summer.
While I am writing this blog post, Rachel my daughter is juicing our Granny Smith apples into the most amazing fresh apple juice, I had already a glass full.

Only a few days ago I came home from Christchurch were I had seven long weeks of cancer treatment. Radiation and chemo therapy and my body is trying hard to recover.
I still have times during the day I feel very tired and sometimes I am in pain.
I lost a lot of weight, because my appetite was gone during treatment.
But each day I will get better and will beat this disease.

In three months time I am going back to Christchurch for a check up and will have another scan done to see if the cancer is gone.
I won't know until then,but in the mean time I will focus on my recovery; meditate daily, have a positive mindset and eat healthy food.

I am staying in the now, not thinking about tomorrow much, enjoy the day given to me, today!

Fighting the big black dragon called C

The big black dragon

Last year our family had a lovely walk on the beach in Marahau near Nelson.
Paul our son told us of his plans to get engaged with Emma and he wanted to do this in Golden Bay near were we live.
Emma loves Nelson and Golden Bay so he decided that would be the best place to ask her.
We were overjoyed and so happy for them both.
So Rachel and I cried a bit of joy.
We walked over the beach and on our way back we found this piece of driftwood and we all tried to guess what it looked like.
It was a dragon we decided, laughed and kept on walking,we forgot all about the piece of 'dragon' driftwood.

Now not even a year later I have to fight this big black dragon.
We all cried, not of joy, but of sadness and shock.
I am diagnosed with uterine cancer and because I can't have a hysterectomy because of an unknown bleeding tendency the treatment will be radiation and chemo therapy for the next 6 weeks.
I twice was admitted to Nelson hospital with heavy bleeding and flown to Christchurch by air ambulance.

I  nearly had my first week of treatment and it is still daunting for us all.
My family is so supportive and I can't do it without them.
We had help from Paul friends, lovely cards and  messages, lots of people praying for us.
My life suddenly goes in slow motion and the days are spend a lot of time around hospital appointments, sitting and watching 'healthy' people walking past and thinking 'that was me only two months ago, how could this have happened to me?'
Financial its a burden as well, I had to stop work and Henk is not working to be with me during treatment for the 6 weeks.
Our life is on hold.

But with help from my family and my friends and my faith I want to beat this big black dragon that 's luring at me and want to pull me under.

It won't happen. I don't know what the future will bring, I can only be in today.

Ollie our new "borador" dog

Ollie came into our life only 3 weeks ago and he is Borador what means Border Collie Labrador cross. He had two owners before us and is only 7 months old.
I found the word Borador on the internet and had never heard of the word before, so it was interesting to read about this mix of the two dogs.
Ollie has more traits of a Border Collie then Labrador, he moves like a Border Collie and eyes his toys or moving objects in front of him.
Ollie is a very quick learner and works out things for himself without commands.
He looks at my face and reads my body language more then any other dog I had before him, Phoebe my beloved Kelpie did this as well, but in another way.
I feel like Ollie is really trying to work out what I am going to do next and he doesn't forget.
Two days ago I took him for a walk with his favourite tennis ball and he dropped the ball into long grass so I couldn't find the tennis ball back, the next day Ollie went over to the same patch of long grass and wanted to drop the new tennis ball into the grass again just as a game, but luckily I could save this ball.
I am reading this amazing book: "The divinity of dogs" by Jennifer Skiff about how dogs can come into our lives for a reason.
At the moment I having a difficult time with my health and the last 5 weeks have not been easy. I am trying to cope with anxiety and other issues going on in my body, sometimes this makes me feel down and not coping very well.
When I am walking and I feel dizzy, Ollie comes and walks right beside me, he doesn't pull the lead, but reassures me with his presence. I have never taught him this, Ollie just reads my body language.
Every morning he comes into my bedroom and he nuzzles my face to wake me up, to say hello I am here, a new day has started.
I am sure Ollie came at the right time into my life.